Coping with Grief While Preparing for Your GCSEs and A Levels
Revising for your GCSEs or A Levels can feel stressful at the best of times. If someone important in your life has died, or if you are facing the death of a loved one, it can make things feel even harder. You might find it difficult to concentrate, feel exhausted, or wonder how you’re supposed to focus on exams when you’re missing, or worrying about, someone so much.
First of all, how you’re feeling is completely understandable. There is no “right” way to grieve. Grief doesn’t move in a straight line, it often feels more like a squiggly one, with ups and downs, easier days and really tough ones. Grief is used to describe the mix of feelings when a loved one has died. Grief can also include intense emotional, physical, and behavioural response to an expected, impending death (such as a loved one’s terminal illness). This can involve anxiety about the future, sadness for lost time, and potential “pre-grief” for that person. If you’re trying to revise while dealing with grief, please know you’re handling something incredibly difficult.
At Jigsaw South East, we support many bereaved and pre-bereaved young people and understand just how challenging this time can be. The ideas below are simply gentle suggestions that might help you balance revision and grief.
It’s okay not to feel okay
You might feel sad, angry, anxious, numb, distracted or all of those in the same day. That’s a normal part of grief. Try not to push those feelings away or bottle them up.
Sometimes just pausing and acknowledging how you feel can help. Even quietly saying to yourself, “I’m feeling really overwhelmed today,” can help you process what’s going on and make it a little easier to focus afterwards.
Break revision into smaller chunks
When you’re grieving, your energy and concentration may be lower than usual. Looking at everything you need to revise can feel overwhelming.
Instead, try focusing on one small piece at a time. One topic. One question. One short study session. Revising for 20–30 minutes and then taking a break can make things feel much more manageable.
Every small step counts. Even a little bit of revision is still progress.
Create a gentle, flexible routine
Grief can affect your sleep, appetite and motivation, which can make it harder to stay on track with revision. Having a simple routine can sometimes help bring a bit of structure back to your day.
Try to include regular meals, short study sessions, breaks, and some kind of movement, even a short walk can help clear your mind. Listening to music you enjoy, journalling, gaming, or reading for a while can also help reset your brain between study sessions.
Most importantly, let your routine be flexible. It’s there to support you, not pressure you. Download a study plan template.
Ask for help – you don’t have to do this alone
If you can, talk to a trusted adult about how you’re feeling. This might be a parent, carer, teacher, tutor or school counsellor.
Schools often understand that bereavement can affect your studies. They may be able to offer extra support, provide a quieter space to work, or make adjustments where possible.
Spending time with family can also help. Sharing memories, talking about the person who died, or simply sitting quietly together can sometimes bring comfort.
If you feel like you need more support, bereavement services or counselling can also be really helpful.
Grief-friendly revision techniques
Some revision techniques can work particularly well when your mind feels busy or distracted.
Writing things down first can help. Spending a few minutes journalling before you start revising can clear some of the thoughts from your head and make it easier to focus.
Short study bursts can also help. The 25:5 method – studying for 25 minutes and then taking a 5-minute break – can make revision feel less overwhelming.
If possible, studying with a friend who understands what you’re going through can help too. You don’t even have to talk about it – just not feeling alone can make a difference.
Grief can be unpredictable
Some days you might manage quite a lot. Other days it might feel impossible to concentrate. Both are completely normal.
On harder days, try reminding yourself: “Today is a tough day. I’ll just do what I can.” Being a little gentler with yourself can reduce frustration and pressure.
Be kind to yourself
Grief is emotionally and physically exhausting. If you can’t revise as much as you hoped, that doesn’t mean you’ve failed.
Your exam results do not define your worth. You are dealing with something incredibly hard, and the fact that you’re still trying shows just how strong you are.
Give yourself something to look forward to
It can help to plan something enjoyable after a revision session. This could be watching a favourite show, meeting up with friends, playing sport, or doing something creative.
Small rewards can make studying feel a bit more manageable and give your brain something positive to look forward to.
You are not alone
Many young people sit exams while dealing with grief. It might not always be visible, but there are others going through similar experiences.
If things feel too heavy, please reach out. Talking to someone you trust such as a teacher, family member, counsellor or support service can really help.
Everyone at Jigsaw South East wishes you the very best with your exams. And whatever happens next, please remember you will be okay.
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